unfaithfulness and me

Something I want to admit and I’ve never done it openly if anything I’ve done it behind closed doors, not that it’s anyone’s business but I do believe for me this is a part of my healing its what’s shaped me to be the soul I am today.

I was once a troubled soul lost fearful, insecure and superficial, I did things that often lead me to hurt others I have since healed from the loneliness and fearing of it.

I am now peeling back one more layer of this coocoon that I have lived in.

During my marriage I wasn’t happy towards the end so I did some ridiculous things 

  1. I joined a swingers website and started cam chatting with other women, I got caught by my wife at the time but rather than admit it I played victim made excuses did anything I could besides take absolute responsibility for my actions and addressing it, I lived in denial even when it hurt her and put her in tears I still persisted on with the excuses to justify myself this went on for some time until our marriage split.

I often tried to justify what cheating was But to be honest there is no justification or label its just plain unfaithfulness as I recently came to understand

  1. Trust is a sacred bond and your actions can do damage
  2. If your unhappy change the situation be it separation or discuss with your partner
  3. Don’t hide anything be it your feelings your emotions or your insecurities as part of a relationship is to work through all this to build a stronger bond

You cannot fear honesty or being alone okay you have to talk unfaithfulness hurts and it can break an already damaged soul.

Being honest is the greatest act of integrity and humility 

Peace love light

Andy.p

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