Becoming an open book

There’s a reason I’ve become such an open book on many levels and a lot of that has to do with the past I lived.

Where I lied, acted dishonestly and generally struggled to tell the truth and be genuine with people, the reason was I feared all these I feared the repercussions of being honest or being genuine fearing it may get me in trouble or upset the person even more or they will run in the other direction.

Little did I know I wasn’t being honest with myself either by doing this, neither was I honouring my soul which deserved better than the suffering I was putting us through, it’s easy to judge a liar or dishonest person rather than understanding why they did it or still do.

We seem to think its okay to destroy or breakdown another person because they’ve done wrong, without truly knowing why they’ve done it, they could be suffering in fear deep inside and by your want to bring them down it adds to that fear even more.

I had that happen to me, I had someone go out of their way to try and bring me down at every turn, I kept saying why me why me, it wasn’t until I truly realised I had brought this upon myself and had to take ownership for it, as I had hurt a person I would call a gentle soul.

Some of us will have someone help us realise and some of us will learn from the impact, yes we have fears but we must learn to overcome them take ownership and work through them.

 My way of growing through this was to slowly make a mindful and conscious effort to be honest and to tell myself there is nothing to fear as their reaction towards your honesty is a reflection of them not you, the more I told myself this the easier it become to be genuine, authentic and honest with everyone I encounter.

I am now more mindful of when it comes to being honest but also more and more forgiving of those being dishonest as I know their sufferings.

Love and light

Andy.p

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